He is here.

Finally.  He is in our arms, and I am so madly in love with him.

I never thought that you could still be amazed and completely shaken by the arrival of a thrid child.  I guess the heart always have space for a new baby, for more love.

I could spend all day just looking at him, and just be intoxicated by his newborn smell.  And yet, I feel sad that this is our last one.  I have truly found myself in becoming a mom, a much unanticipated surprise for me, but I have found that this is where I find the most rewards, where I really feel like I have a purpose, which is not something I would have thought when I was younger or going through school.

He is simply adorable, and just lovable.  I know I will miss this newborn stage, and how fast it goes.  I try to take it all in, even more then I ever did beofre, just to make sure that I will never forget.

I already miss his kicks, and movements, but I am glad that I can see them now, and just feel his skin, see his beautiful face smell this heavenly smell of the newborn.  I don’t know how I will make myself to the idea of this being the last one.  Seeing so many people around me being pregnant really remind me daily that this beautiful pahse of my life is over.  And I can help but ask myself : what is left after that?

I will truly miss the intense and most exilirating moment of life where after a long labor, you finally get to meet this new little person.  This must be the best feeling I have ever experienced, and I got the chance to live it 3 times.

I have to concentrate on what is ahead of me, and cherish these moments in my heart, in the hope that it will make me a better parent when the times are harder to go by.

Looking at him now, makes me realize how easy it is to forget.  Our 3yo and 5yo also were, at one point this tiny, and yet, now they seem suddenly so big.  But inside them, there is still this tiny newborn that we have cherished and contemplated over, even when things don’t go the way we want, when they are sad or mad…and THAT is sometimes hard to remember.

I have vowed this time to truly enjoy this last little one, and to never forget:  the feelings I have and the moments we share with him.  He will grow, like the others, but I just don’t want to forget.

He is here.

6 thoughts on “He is here.

  1. so very happy for you, and maybe a twinge of jealousy:) I found you on MDC…a post you had written about waldorf about a year ago….I feel like I have met a kindred spirit:)best wishes to you….love and light:)

  2. Thank you so much for these sweet words!I totally understand the twinge of jealousy! I am already missing the first days, the first moments, and cannot beleive that it might be the last time I get to experience this. I already know I will feel the same way when seeing new moms with their new bundles of joy!

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